This Girl...

There's this girl that I met online. I haven't seen her face to face, I haven't even heard her voice yet, but she has influenced my life so much.

There are times when I long to go back home (to the Philippines) just because her face crossed my mind. There are times when I write poetry, just because I think of her.

Her name is etched in my heart now. A beautiful name, but it doesn't measure up to the beauty that is her personality. She has a lot to give. She dotes on her brother. She loves her parents.

She is smart. She does her job well and she loves it. She has a creative mind. She speaks different languages. She is witty and funny.

She was not successful in everything though, as she has also suffered some heartaches. She doesn't have many friends as she had to keep moving from one place to another.

She is kind of weird. She has a peculiar love for food. Some things she like, you'll find them strange, and you probably wouldn't imagine she was like that if you've just met her.

She is elegant. She knows her place and she knows how to act appropriately depending on the situation. She knows how to dress. Fashion is one thing that comes naturally to her.

Although I've spent quite a bit of time talking to her and getting to know her, there are so many things that I still don't know about her, and want to know about her. I just hope the next months, and years, maybe the rest of my life, I will be given the chance to keep her and get to know her fully. I am sure there will be a lot of surprises, and that just makes me even more eager to spend time with her.

Today I got scared that I won't be given that chance. I was taken over by the feeling of hopelessness. I tried to laugh it off, but it didn't really comfort me that much. I am not sure what I need right now, but a friend told me to write how I feel. I didn't want to at first because I knew that she would read it and I'm not sure if I want her to read it.

That's why this entry is going to this blog site, my secret hideaway, where only a few really close people know who I am. Please go ahead and tell me what you think if you are reading this by any chance. Should I post this entry on a place where I know she will read it or not?

*There might be more to come...